Jul. 15th, 2019



                                          just like that
                                                    for Jason Rheubin Rasmus 12/20/72 - 5/26/19				



words fail in the face of death
they left on amorphous wings
	wings of breath & love
	wings seen & 
			unseen

because after
		days & months & years

he died
	
	just like that 
& I am my mother’s only child
		showering in tears
				       & forgetting
	
you angered me so fucking often
	but you are 
			blood & history
	      you are my brother
& what is left?
	a pinch of ashes around my neck
					& memories

		chasing rainbows & clay shot from a bb gun 
					into my stomach
					& smuggling an iguana into the country

you are so loved by so many
	with stories that last for hours
				   	days
					       months &
							years
you are
				gone

just like that
& your friends are now my family
			 my brother in absentia
		it takes a village to 
					replace you

just like that 
	my sister-in-law is so much more important

& you & I weren’t even all that close
		(to be honest)
but god
	I miss you, Jason
		      my brother
	the only one who could possibly 
					     know
				& comprehend
				         our childhood

just like that
	just like that

	you
	      are
			gone
& even surrounded by love
	I miss you
& feel so very, very
						alone





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