just like that
for Jason Rheubin Rasmus 12/20/72 - 5/26/19
words fail in the face of death
they left on amorphous wings
wings of breath & love
wings seen &
unseen
because after
days & months & years
he died
just like that
& I am my mother’s only child
showering in tears
& forgetting
you angered me so fucking often
but you are
blood & history
you are my brother
& what is left?
a pinch of ashes around my neck
& memories
chasing rainbows & clay shot from a bb gun
into my stomach
& smuggling an iguana into the country
you are so loved by so many
with stories that last for hours
days
months &
years
you are
gone
just like that
& your friends are now my family
my brother in absentia
it takes a village to
replace you
just like that
my sister-in-law is so much more important
& you & I weren’t even all that close
(to be honest)
but god
I miss you, Jason
my brother
the only one who could possibly
know
& comprehend
our childhood
just like that
just like that
you
are
gone
& even surrounded by love
I miss you
& feel so very, very
alone